A few months ago, a call from your boyfriend/girlfriend used to set your heart on fire. Your own case was so bad your friends had to carry a fire extinguisher around you. You couldn’t wait to talk to them and hang out with them. Mentions of their name would set off, among other things, loud chimes of wedding bells in your head. Now, you’re over all that; your relationship is mostly routine and frankly, you’d much rather hangout with your friends.
If this is a near-perfect description of your relationship, you can go ahead and relax because this is very normal. You are now in the ‘post-honeymoon’ stage where new has become normal and chemistry has given way to, “Ohhhh, he/she is calling again?”
If you’re feeling bored in your relationship or you feel as though your bae is getting antsy, you should read this before you do anything….drastic.
Many times, you can get caught up in the excitement and novelty that a new relationship brings and you fail to nurture what will actually sustain a relationship through a rough time: friendship. Always make sure you are actively getting to know your boy/girlfriend. Have deep, meaningful conversations. Know their love languages , exchange personal stories, ask questions, and make it a habit to learn one new thing about them each day for as long as you’re together.
Take up MMA boxing…TOGETHER –
Or hiking or video games or cooking classes, It doesn’t really matter what, just make sure you do it together and that it is something you both want to do. The important thing is that you’re doing stuff as a couple that you’ve never done before. If you run out of new things to do, find other new new things to do. Find something you both agree on and think will be fun and go at it. The possibilities for this are endless.
Early in a relationship, couples tend to focus more on their similarities than their differences. But differences are bound to exist so it is wise to start paying attention to and even celebrating the contrasting qualities that shape the way you each see the world. These differences are what make you unique as a couple. When those differences become problems, emphasize compromise, but rather than focus on your own needs, actively look for the places where you can agree. Even in the most difficult arguments, there is usually a place where your wants and needs align. Mastering the art of compromise is a lifelong skill.
Now that you’re here:
Being bored or restless in a relationship doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship has gotten worse. Yes, the butterflies-in-the-stomach situation might be a thing of the past, but now you’re more comfortable and relaxed around each other and there’s a lot of good that comes with feeling a little more comfortable with another person. You are no longer overly concerned with appearances and you can be more honest.
Absence makes the heart……–
This may come as a shock, but none of you will die if you spend one day or even one week apart from each other. If you’re feeling bored in your relationship, one simple reason could be that you’re seeing each other too much or maybe familiarity has led to complacence. Either way, getting away from each other for a bit might help you realize how much you still enjoy being together. This does not mean you have to ‘take a break’ from the relationship, it could just mean scheduling a day or two of ‘me-time’ every week.