Why am I feminist?
Lately, I’ve been talking about this a lot because every time I express my views someone says to me, “don’t tell me you’re one of those feminists” and usually they say it with disgust. Often I smile back and try to explain why I am one and why I, a human being deserves equality and how Feminism benefits men. Well, I don’t do that anymore (but only since last week! LOL.). Now I just say, “I am a feminist” and let them do the questioning and mental gymnastics.
Women and men should have equal social, economic, political and personal rights. It’s 2018, we should not even be having this conversation but here we are.
I am a feminist because at 5 years old, I was already told to learn how to cook, not because of my own hunger but because of the hypothetical man that would some day marry me. I’m a feminist because in cases of assault or rape, girls and women still get asked what they were wearing. I’m a feminist because I support the age of women reclaiming their sexuality, in fact, I’m all for women reclaiming all their wasted time.
We still sexualize girls, even baby girls at a young age, telling them to sit or dress properly because older men are visiting. Young women are threatened with “who will marry you?” every time they show that they have a voice, as if the purpose of a woman or man is to be legally bound to another human for the sake of it.
The seat of life is too small for women to keep trying to make space for men who almost always come along with their egos.
Sometimes we hold a different view because we don’t consider the implications; I recently realized from a conversation that not many people believe marital rape should be a punishable offense.
If I’m being honest, I’m not a feminist only because of social issues, some days I’m a feminist because I want the term ‘beauty and brains’ to die a sudden death. The mere thought that being beautiful and smart is a rarity, stresses me out. Honestly, everything stresses me out. Being called an ashewo stresses me out, being asked if I’ve taken permission from my husband to cut my hair, go somewhere or change my looks, stresses me out. When the response to me wanting two children is “what if you have another girl?”, it stresses me out.
I’m a feminist because I am and all the women in me are tired.